Research

I went home and sulked for a few days, then realised i would never get my baby if i did nothing. I hopped on the internet and started researching diets and other weight loss options. I happened to fall upon a web site for lap banding. I think after that I went site from site reading about all the success stories and from then on decided it was for me.

I rang up the clinic and made my initial appointment. It felt great to be finally doing something about this weight that was holding me back. Two weeks later i was in there having my appointment with the surgeon, dietitian and psychologist. I had booked my surgery in for the following month on the 16th of October 2006!

Starting Over

Six months passed before I felt like we could start all over again. We went back to the doctor to get a new prescription of the medicines. Another 6 months past by, with one disappointment after another, I didn’t know how much more I could take. We were reviewed by my ob and he informed us that he could no longer help us, and referred our case to a fertility specialist.

Test after test was performed, most of them being quite painful and intrusive. When we finally went back to the fertility specialist he informed us that we had male and female factor infertility, and that our only chance of having a baby would be through IVF. He then went on to say that with the weight that I was currently at, there was no way I would be approved for IVF. I was heartbroken.

Living in a bubble

Through the next few weeks I felt like I needed to live in a bubble, I was so happy but at the same time I kept getting this gut feeling like there was something wrong. When I was about 8 weeks I woke up and I was spotting, I made a call through to my doctor he just told me to rest as much as I can and if it gets any worse to come in and see him. Over the next week it gradually got worse. When I went in to see the doctor he was able to give me another ultrasound so that we could see what was going on. I saw a beautiful bean with a strong heartbeat. I started to feel a little more relaxed with the situation. That night I started cramping. Not to sure what was going on we headed off to the hospital just to be safe. This is where my nightmare began.

After sitting in the waiting room for over two hours, I was finally seen by a doctor who didn’t have the time of day for me. I told him my concerns and he laughed in my face told me their clearly wasn’t anything wrong because I didn’t have blood running down my legs. From there Mr S decided to take me straight to Bankstown hospital because the cramping was getting worse. The triage nurse sent me to get a urine sample and I miscarried in the bathroom.

After that I was in shock. I didn’t know what to do, I couldn’t move because I was in so much pain. Mr S came to check on me and as soon as he saw me he knew what had happened. The nurses were great they moved me into a bed and had me seen to almost immediately. I spent most of the night in tears, I was placed in a private room next to the paediatrics area, where I ended up spending the night listening to a sick baby crying. It was one of the hardest nights I ever had to endure. By noon the next day I was sent for an ultrasound to confirm that I had lost the baby, I had not passed all the tissue and ended up needing some surgery to top my day off. I spent the next two weeks in bed; I didn’t want to see any body. My perfect little family had just gone back to two people overnight.

The Beginning

I guess I should start from where my weight loss journey began… It all started when Mr S and I decided we wanted to try for a baby. It was such a turning point in our lives, who knew what was ahead for us.

After a year of us trying to have a baby with no success, we decided that it was time to get some help because it clearly wasn’t going to happen on its own. We were two months off getting married. After a diagnosis of Poly Cystic Ovarian Syndrome it became clear that we did actually need a bit of medical assistance. So we started on some tablets called Clomid which pretty much forced my body to ovulate! Guess what…it worked the first month!

The day before we were married we went to the doctor for my very first obstetrician appointment, it seemed like an eternity in that wait room, the doctor was running 2 hours behind and I had so much organising to do for the next day. The receptionist offered for us to come back another time, but there was no way that I would leave that room with out seeing my baby first. By the time I was eventually called to go in I had worked myself up so much that something was wrong. So he started with the ultrasound first. I cried when I was finally able to see my baby for the very first time, I saw a heart beating away.

On the 23rd of July 2005 I married the man of my dreams. I was so excited, I had just snagged myself such a great guy and now we were going to be parents. We announced to everyone that we were going to become parents at our reception; they were all excited just like us. We left the following day on our honeymoon and enjoyed a perfect few days away.